Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Wednesday
Just haven't felt like coming back here: I am going back to previous blog. I started this one because I wanted to feel free to discuss whatever came up in my life but here it showed up and I have lost the energy to write-this must have been initiated in a very shut down time,
Friday, August 7, 2009
Still Friday 8/7/2009
It was Tuesday evening when Lisa was born and it was already 8/8/1963 in London/Greenwich.
This morning a quiet time after finally getting the nerve to turn off the TV. Why on earth would I choose to listen to Joe Scarborough and his evil screed? Turn on the radio which can get intense but I can change it more easily and some amount of interaction is required I am not quite so easily brainwashed.
At any rate yesterday I cleaned up the kitchen and the bathroom which created a sense of order in my early morning-so peaceful that Steve has fallen back to sleep. Earlier in the week I turned down the opportunity to purchase paper plates because they have become so terribly expensive. what I have discovered is that I find it easier to keep order here if I wash dishes. Somehow using paper plates causes a disconnect somewhere inside and I then find it difficult to keep the kitchen tidy. Somehow when I use my own dishes and pots and other utensils there is a connection that makes it easier for me to tidy up after cooking. Doing things the old-fashioned way creates connection within and this connection eases my way. Noticed that Ceres is now at 1+Libra trining my NNode and Sun in Gemini-a blessing of connection Cerres in the 6th and NNodeSun in the 2nd. Brings a light on my declaration that I am a Hearth Witch and this morning I suspect that I was once a Vestal Virgin-the connection of Vesta and the NNode/Sun of my chart makes me think that-definetly a private, subjective person, someone so alone that she focuses on what makes it easier to do dishes. Someone haunted by errors of her youth.
This morning a quiet time after finally getting the nerve to turn off the TV. Why on earth would I choose to listen to Joe Scarborough and his evil screed? Turn on the radio which can get intense but I can change it more easily and some amount of interaction is required I am not quite so easily brainwashed.
At any rate yesterday I cleaned up the kitchen and the bathroom which created a sense of order in my early morning-so peaceful that Steve has fallen back to sleep. Earlier in the week I turned down the opportunity to purchase paper plates because they have become so terribly expensive. what I have discovered is that I find it easier to keep order here if I wash dishes. Somehow using paper plates causes a disconnect somewhere inside and I then find it difficult to keep the kitchen tidy. Somehow when I use my own dishes and pots and other utensils there is a connection that makes it easier for me to tidy up after cooking. Doing things the old-fashioned way creates connection within and this connection eases my way. Noticed that Ceres is now at 1+Libra trining my NNode and Sun in Gemini-a blessing of connection Cerres in the 6th and NNodeSun in the 2nd. Brings a light on my declaration that I am a Hearth Witch and this morning I suspect that I was once a Vestal Virgin-the connection of Vesta and the NNode/Sun of my chart makes me think that-definetly a private, subjective person, someone so alone that she focuses on what makes it easier to do dishes. Someone haunted by errors of her youth.
Friday 8/7/09
in the evening 8:12 8/7/1963 Lisa Marie Whisenant was born. Hard birth I was 16 she was breech. She was beautiful and so was I. The tragic story I have written about and I guess I will again but todday the sorrow is acute-Lisaa dieddd last yeeaaar 8/11/2008 alone full of pain medicatiions and grief her own child had died the year before.
I feel as though I am wounded by acid thrown and splashing alll over my face. I want to blame myself for being the abandoning mother which is what I was. I ran didn't know how to reclaim all that was lost. The families disbanded-my folks to the mountains and then Denver and the Shisenants to Las Vegas.
I was so ashamed of my mother-loud and crude although she was not. She was simply a strong Aries who had been through hell and was still on her feet. In those years she simply didn't have the energy nor the finances to pamper her fragile and rebellious daughter. My parents paid a high price to get back out of Moscow- we all did. I am grateful to them for leading the way-if we had stayed I would never have learned anything.
Lisa a beautiful and gentle child who just wanted to be loved and I was distracted by not knowing what to do, by the crippling isolation-no one loved the bad girl that I was- acting out stirring up something to keep myself from being alone . Slow moving tragedy never to be undone eending in Lisa's eaarly death. Shawn her brother doing much better but deeply wounded. I call him but am old enough not to push. He spends time with his father for which I am grateful.
OOOH!! Hades Moon-Moon 10+Leo/Pluto 11+Leo squaring Mars and Venus in Taurus and Chiron in Scorpio. The pain of this T-square the basis of everything I mmmmanaged so thaaat I wasn't a total train wreck.
courtney sent me a postcard htaat just sums upp my conflicted mars rising-a little girl sstanding on the FRONT of her fathers skunk train-so full of excitement ready to go for anything but of course totally at risk. Courtney saaid that the photo reminded her of me. HMMM! I saw the wise one shinging through her little girl disquise in that gift. Courtney not just another poor girl but rather someone bright and perceptive.
The days are growing shorter already-past Lamas heading now into harvest. Just walked out to get the paper and once again the beautiful eclipse full moon is shining in the SW aand theere is a huge blossom on the zuchinni plant and even the sage looks full and strong-I planted saaaage next to the zuchinni and the saage is not happy has very weak flavor. the basil and green beans and tomato plants all seem so strong aand full of life. Morning I love morning. There is always a song in me that saayss thank you thank you thank you.
The pupose of the outrageous racism coming from FOX,etc is showing itseelf in the screaming hoardes marching on the Democrats and preventing them from meeting and talking. this is the perfect preview of what the corporations are planning for us- constant programming via FOX, Limbaugh,Hannity, Dobbs,etc. has good people confused. I remember Farncisco telling me that our clerk was forever telling him to listen to FOX if wanted to really know what is going on. this is happening all over the country-the owner of FOX lost 1/2 billion starting the network but now of course it was worth it.
Listening to Lannie Davis argue about Hondurous-what a pig-thought that he was a good guy-he is working for the Honduran Chamber of Commerce (called something else) which means read Lannie has joined the fascists.
At any raate I do see the all out war coming in for 2012-the corporate maasters aaare going to do everything they ccan to gain complete control. I know that in the end they will fail but I also believe blood will be shed before we get there. Pluto in Capricorn will finish up the work of Uranus and Neptune and will usher in a new world in which the US will NOT be the biggest bully on the block-I don't hate my folk but I do hate the actions of the chemical corps,etc. Mansanto's greed has resulted in the destruction of butterfly life and bee life on which our lives depend. I can go on and I will say that I am sure that their are things going on that I never dreamed of yet.
I feel as though I am wounded by acid thrown and splashing alll over my face. I want to blame myself for being the abandoning mother which is what I was. I ran didn't know how to reclaim all that was lost. The families disbanded-my folks to the mountains and then Denver and the Shisenants to Las Vegas.
I was so ashamed of my mother-loud and crude although she was not. She was simply a strong Aries who had been through hell and was still on her feet. In those years she simply didn't have the energy nor the finances to pamper her fragile and rebellious daughter. My parents paid a high price to get back out of Moscow- we all did. I am grateful to them for leading the way-if we had stayed I would never have learned anything.
Lisa a beautiful and gentle child who just wanted to be loved and I was distracted by not knowing what to do, by the crippling isolation-no one loved the bad girl that I was- acting out stirring up something to keep myself from being alone . Slow moving tragedy never to be undone eending in Lisa's eaarly death. Shawn her brother doing much better but deeply wounded. I call him but am old enough not to push. He spends time with his father for which I am grateful.
OOOH!! Hades Moon-Moon 10+Leo/Pluto 11+Leo squaring Mars and Venus in Taurus and Chiron in Scorpio. The pain of this T-square the basis of everything I mmmmanaged so thaaat I wasn't a total train wreck.
courtney sent me a postcard htaat just sums upp my conflicted mars rising-a little girl sstanding on the FRONT of her fathers skunk train-so full of excitement ready to go for anything but of course totally at risk. Courtney saaid that the photo reminded her of me. HMMM! I saw the wise one shinging through her little girl disquise in that gift. Courtney not just another poor girl but rather someone bright and perceptive.
The days are growing shorter already-past Lamas heading now into harvest. Just walked out to get the paper and once again the beautiful eclipse full moon is shining in the SW aand theere is a huge blossom on the zuchinni plant and even the sage looks full and strong-I planted saaaage next to the zuchinni and the saage is not happy has very weak flavor. the basil and green beans and tomato plants all seem so strong aand full of life. Morning I love morning. There is always a song in me that saayss thank you thank you thank you.
The pupose of the outrageous racism coming from FOX,etc is showing itseelf in the screaming hoardes marching on the Democrats and preventing them from meeting and talking. this is the perfect preview of what the corporations are planning for us- constant programming via FOX, Limbaugh,Hannity, Dobbs,etc. has good people confused. I remember Farncisco telling me that our clerk was forever telling him to listen to FOX if wanted to really know what is going on. this is happening all over the country-the owner of FOX lost 1/2 billion starting the network but now of course it was worth it.
Listening to Lannie Davis argue about Hondurous-what a pig-thought that he was a good guy-he is working for the Honduran Chamber of Commerce (called something else) which means read Lannie has joined the fascists.
At any raate I do see the all out war coming in for 2012-the corporate maasters aaare going to do everything they ccan to gain complete control. I know that in the end they will fail but I also believe blood will be shed before we get there. Pluto in Capricorn will finish up the work of Uranus and Neptune and will usher in a new world in which the US will NOT be the biggest bully on the block-I don't hate my folk but I do hate the actions of the chemical corps,etc. Mansanto's greed has resulted in the destruction of butterfly life and bee life on which our lives depend. I can go on and I will say that I am sure that their are things going on that I never dreamed of yet.
Saturday, August 1, 2009
Saturday
In a coouple of weeks I will have a new keyboard and can give up this key sticking thing. I try to edit as I go along but I always miss things and this program doesn't allow me to goo in later and edit.
We had our first zuchinni with past last night the secret is to allow them to grow aand not overr water. I am so excited and I am thinking of haaving the groooup here in Richmond come and build us a french garden plot so thaat we can raise stuff all year long. I am definately going to make the "salad box" which is raised shallow beds for raising lettuces aaand greens. And the big thing-raising potatoes in a couple of large bags of potting soil. I really want to eat my own food and so does meighbor Rosita-we will mke this a beatiful spot.
We had our first zuchinni with past last night the secret is to allow them to grow aand not overr water. I am so excited and I am thinking of haaving the groooup here in Richmond come and build us a french garden plot so thaat we can raise stuff all year long. I am definately going to make the "salad box" which is raised shallow beds for raising lettuces aaand greens. And the big thing-raising potatoes in a couple of large bags of potting soil. I really want to eat my own food and so does meighbor Rosita-we will mke this a beatiful spot.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
